I could not decide one thing to write about tonight, so I'll post on a couple of different topics:
Topic 1: the Oprah show re-run of the wives who figure out they are gay
Loved it! I have it on my Tevo saved forever, but since Oprah aired it again for the 3rd time, I had to watch it again too. I told W I am keeping it forever on the Tevo box. She laughed at me a little, but I told her, this is my story and it just makes me feel good to watch it. I had been feeling some guilt again for some reason about my ex and ruining his life. Watching this, made me realize again that it was something that I had to do. It's not that I ever didn't think I had to, just that nowadays I will sometimes forget that feeling of inevitable-ness I had when I'm wallowing in guilt. I know that it would not have been fair to stay with him and not be 100% with him, and likewise with W and her ex, who was a woman. Anyway, it is worth watching again from time to time.
Topic 2: Am I the only woman in blog land who does not like Hillary?
I know, she showed some emotion the other day and that was good for her, but for some reason, my gut feeling is that I just do not trust her. Why is that exactly? I did not hate Bill. I think it is a great idea to elect a woman. I just feel that she says what she thinks people want her to say and does this little dance with the issues. With one group she says she was always against the war, with another she sidesteps that and acts as though she was for it, but now against it. I caught myself wondering.. do I judge her because she is a woman? I don't mean to. I know that if she were a man, no one would think one iota about what she says being mean or would not be so hard on her. But still, I just do not like her one bit. It is a gut thing. I can't figure out why exactly. I do think that seeing her have a human emotion is much better. I think I maybe don't like seeing women who don't really show emotion. It does not seem natural. Please, chime in on this topic if you all want. Not meaning to offend anyone here either, this is just my opinion, or rather my "feeling." I do like Obama however. I would definitely vote for him. I will be voting democrat this year, but I will have a very hard time voting for Hilary if she wins the bid. I have always been a swing voter myself, voting for who I feel will do the best job but not on party lines alone. I'm not sure, but I may have to be totally a democratic voter now because of the gay right issue. I do really like Rudy on the republican side, but he is not looking like he will win anyway. He is the only one of the republicans who is not in bed with the damn religious right, which may be why he is losing that bid.
Topic 3: Coming out to old friends you have not seen in ages
We were invited to dinner saturday night with a couple who does know my story. She invited another of her friends over whom I used to know fairly well, on a casual basis, you know, I never went out with this girl or never did things with her and her husband as a couple, but would see her often at my son's school, target, eating out etc. I even talked to her several times about a job. She was not a good friend of mine but more than an acquaintance. Anyway, I asked friend 1 if this girl knew I was divorced etc. Friend 1 said she would let her know ahead of time if I did not mind so as to not make her or me feel awkward. Apparently, she told her on the phone and the girl sort of freaked out. She had a good friend leaving her husband for another man and was devasted by it. They all did a lot as a group. Anyway, friend 2 came over even though she was freaked and just did not make eye contact or talk to me. I was a bit shocked to say the least. Talked to friend 1 the next day and she apologized a lot and said that she suggested for her to do whatever she needed to, ie: not come if need be. The girl came anyway.
Got me to thinking... why is this so disturbing to her when she did not know me all that well and did not know my ass of an ex H at all. What makes her think she can assume anything about my life. My kids are doing really well and even the ass Ex and I are getting along ok. I don't think it was a homophobic issue with her, just a divorce issue. I find it funny how some people have a problem with one or the other. divorce or being gay, but not both. I mean, it's my life not her's. Why not just be glad we are all doing ok and smile and wish me luck on this next part of my journey. I have to say it is probably fear generating this reaction. She is afraid it could happen to her, divorce that is. And she should realize that it could happen to anybody, even her. But that is too scary for her I'm sure. It was for me too but I made it.
Just a few random thoughts on this Thursday night. The weekend is coming up people. Our alone date night weekend! Yay! We have no money but we'll just stay home and rent the L word... my, my.
later
L
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5 comments:
Hi there,
Thanks for stopping by my blog! Sounds like we have a lot in common with kids, ex's, etc. And I'm with you on the Hillary topic. I would LOVE to see a woman in office... just not HER. Can't quite figure it out, but I just don't trust her. Take care!
~k
I'm cool with Hilary, but if we are going to talk about who lesbian's want for President I much rather have Madonna or A. Jolie for president. ;) And I've only watched 1 1/2 seasons of the L word but someone told me the other day that those actors are almost all straight! Is that true?
You don't have to like Hilary, there is no rule that says you do. I would advise you however to carefully look at the issues and make a decision for the person who will not negatively affect your life. For instance, I would never, ever vote for a republican (even Rudi,) because he does not support my civil rights as a lesbian woman.
Re: your friend. I am so sorry that you had to sit there for the evening with her not looking at you or speaking to you. I would have either confronted her or left. That is rude, rude, rude behavior on her part and it's a shame you were exposed to it.
You don't owe her any explanation or apology for how you're living your life, perhaps she should take a look at her selfish, judgmental, bigoted motives. Bitch.
RSG,
I will always consider the issues and how they affect me, however, in 2006 my state ammended our constitution to never allow anyone in the future to allow gay marriage, and it was voted into effect to ammend our constitution by 85%, so as long as it is left up the states to decide this, my state will NEVER allow it. That was one month after my divorce was final and when I voted, I saw my ex H's name on the voter sign in sheet right before mine. He had never voted at all before that time. the whole time we were married. AND, I am sure he was there for that one item. (just interesting to me) anyway, I do think that decision will be left to the states, don't you?
Titration,
I don't know about the actors on the L word, I've heard at least a couple of them are lesbians.
k
thanks for commenting, and yes we seem to have a lot in common.
I heard that Hillary may have shifted somewhat in her interview on Tyra. She said she supports all committed relationships.
Other than that, I too have a gut sense that she's not quite what she portrays.
Jan
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